Tuesday, November 10, 2009

If I Had To Schedule A Kids' Network

What if there was a kids' network that was programmed by someone who actually liked you? If I was a kid, I would want cartoonists to schedule network programming for sure, (instead of psychologists, lawyers and market research biddies) since we are just big kids ourselves and still watch cartoons and puppet shows and play with toys.

Network Schedule


Weekdays:

Early Morning

Little kids get up early before school starts and they need some entertainment.
During this block, we will schedule the cartoons that aim at the youngest viewers.

The shows we pull from will be mostly TV cartoons from the 50s and 60s.

We will age up the shows as it gets nearer 8:00

------------------------------------------------

5:45 am Official Pre-Cartoon Wait

This is a throwback to the 60s early morning schedule.
Before the cartoons came on, us little kids would have to wait through boring stuff for a seeming eternity. This wait would make the cartoons so much sweeter when they finally came on.

We will make fun of this 15 minutes of torture by running stuff like:
The Indian Head with an annoying tone playing in the background

Farm reportThe image “http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1785000/images/_1788848_farm1.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.
Bowling For Dollars
Bingo

Or:

MR. WAIT

This show stars a man peeking from behind a desk with a big clock behind him.
The clock is named “Mr. Wait”

The top of the man's head is named
"Truancy Glare"
His lips are called "Purple Heed"

As far as we know the lips and forehead are not attched because we never see them at the same time.

Mr. Wait ticks and ticks and the second hand moves slower as the forehead behind the desk drones on about things you can do while you wait for the wonderful cartoon shows that are like ice cream painted on your eyes.

You can : clean your room boys and girls
Wash your hands and face twice and don't forget your ears
Do homework and eat non-sugary cereal

We keep cutting to the evil clock. It has a mean face and laughs as time slowly trudges away while the kids at home fidget about anxiously waiting for the first cartoons to start.

Time Passing Gags

Vines Growing up House
http://www.sethbarnes.com/blogphotos/sethbarnes/www/kudzu_barn.jpg
Kids look outside Window- they see a rabbit decomposing (time lapse photography)



Finally a cartoon title sequence starts up, and just as the kids get all excited, the film breaks and we cut to a card that reads “Technical Difficulties, Please Stand By”

We cut back to the clock for a 5 second countdown, 5,4,3,2..........1. A planet teeming with life explodes on screen and then the real cartoons start!

The kids go crazy!


6:00 – 6:30 - Cartoon Cereal Serials and Shorts

a) Serial

Every day from Monday to Friday we will run a serialized cartoon strip from the 50s or 60s.
Ruff’ 'N’ Reddy
Clutch Cargo
Colonel Bleep
Tom Terrific
Etc.

Each of these series were made of 5 minute episodes that ended with a cliffhanger. There would be anywhere from 10-20 episodes of these serials.
The kids have to watch every day to find out how the story ends.

b) Short TV cartoons that weren’t part of half hour shows, like:

Dodo The Kid From Outer Space
Hercules
Roger Ramjet
Lippy The Lion and Hardy Har Har

The Lineup After the Early Morning Half Hour:
Monday
6:30 Deputy Dawg
7:00 Super Six
7:30 Tom and Jerry

Tuesday

The Flintstones
Alvin and The Chipmunks
Heckle and Jeckle

Wednesday
The Jetsons
Bozo
Fox and Crow and Friends

Thursday
Magilla Gorilla
Astroboy
HarveyToons
Friday
Top Cat
Mighty Heroes
Woody Woodpecker with Walter Lantz

------------------------------------------------
Lunch Hour
Secret Cartoon Club:

This is a live-action wraparound for a show that features assorted short syndicated cartoons or some new ones.

The show opens with a wobbly hand held camera coming up to a door with a little closed peep slot.
Above the peep slot is a sign: “Secret Cartoon Club. No Grownups Allowed” scrawled in childlike lettering.

The camera stops and a little fist raises up into scene to knock on the door
Rap rap rap

The little panel opens and we see eyes peering down at the kid who knocked.
“What’s the password?”
“Immaturity!”
The door opens and the kid is let into a secret room in a run down clubhouse.
There are folding chairs in the middle of the room.

Kids dressed in 50s type clothes are sitting in the chairs
Striped shirts, Beany caps, Jughead hats
Girls in frilly dresses with chocolate smears on their faces

There is also a live duck with a striped shirt sitting on one of the chairs
The duck's master on another.
This is the cartoon audience.

There is a raised stage with an old screen.

A Projector starts up and runs the cartoons.

Every day we do gags in the live set about how important it is to keep this whole club secret.

MAN INTERLOPER

One day there is a full grown man sitting in one of the chairs.

He is dressed in a kids’ outfit

It’s too small

Shorts, with hairy legs coming out

click the link below to see more details:


Half way through the episode an alarm goes off and we realize that this is a grownup

The kids capture him and lead him to the punishment chamber

The Secret Cartoon Club Of The Future

One day we have a contest
One of the kids wins and the prize is:
He gets to travel to a million years in the future
Everything we know of is gone, except the secret cartoon club, because there will always be a need for cartoons
A giant brain projects cartoon films directly into the minds of kids

------------------------------------------------

After School
3:00
Huckleberry Hound
3:30
Beany and Cecil
4:00
Quick Draw McGraw
4:30
Yogi Bear

------------------------------------------------

Saturday Morning

On Saturday Mornings we feature our big guns.

Great packages of classic fully animated classic cartoons and 3 Stooges. - Plus new cartoons that I produce.

The Three Stooges
The Original 1960 Bugs Bunny Show
Mighty Mouse Playhouse
Tom and Jerry/Tex Avery Show
Popeye
The Daffy Duck Show




This is all the wild 40s WB cartoons with new wraparounds animated in Bob Clampett’s style by John and his crew
Wraparounds, presentation
All of our cartoon programming will be presented with really fun intros and wraparounds, plus commercials for our toy company
http://johnkstuff.blogspot.com/2006/12/direct-sponsorship-sell-toys-of.html

The toy company will license the characters from the cartoons we run and make merchandise for all the characters. Then we'd make commercials selling the toys.

Original Programming:

Wally Whimsy and The Goofy Gremlins
http://johnkpitch.blogspot.com/2009/08/wally-whimsy-pilot-story.html

He Hog The Atomic Pig

http://johnkpitch.blogspot.com/2008/01/he-hog-and-villains.html

The Heartaches
http://johnkstuff.blogspot.com/2006/02/calling-all-girls-heartaches.html

Kaspar The Unfriendly Bear and His Enemieshttp://johnkpitch.blogspot.com/2009/09/kaspar-pilot.html

Never would there be more fun than if I was a programming executive. I reckon I can promise you that.

83 comments:

jonjonson said...

Sounds really cool, John.

Bg Porter said...

I remember being really little and getting up early on Sundays to watch Hanna-Barbera Tom & Jerry cartoons (and occasionally the odd 60's era ones like 'Dicky Moe") and having to always sit through the tail end of the Oral Roberts show first. The evil clock would have been much, much better...

I would totally put my kids in front of the channel you're talking about.

Franky said...

If only I had the money to be a mostly hands-off producer for you, John.

Craig said...

You have tapped into what it felt like to have been a kid when we were.
I'd just add more puppets and hosts. But the hosts had to work puppets and draw cartoons. . .

Trevor Thompson said...

Too bad you're not pals with Ted Turner. I'd get cable just so I could watch that channel.

Paul B said...

Please God, if you are real, make this happen!


I promise to go to the bathroom whenever I feel the need to fart and pull my elbows off the table when lunch.

Jake Thomas said...

That would be the only channel I would ever watch!

The suspicious men would be rip offs of Ollie Johnston and Frank Thomas, and after all the kids would laugh and laugh at Looney Tunes, the Ollie and Frank dressed like kids would tell them:

"Oh those cartoons are funny here on the west coast but those Dalt Wisney cartoons are much more popular and enjoyed in the middle states where the best Americans live. Scientists have proved that watching a Dalt Wisney cartoon is equal to one serving of broccoli and cauliflower."

smackmonkey said...

DANG! I am soooo playing hookey from work...er...I mean school! I better stock up on the Ovaltine.

Zoran Taylor said...

If you HAD to? Sounds like you really WANT to! Great ideas, by the way.

Eidenbrock said...

Oh no! I didn't see our boy George anywhere in that line-up!

sunny kharbanda said...

Sounds terrific.

I read the article while listening to that Al Hirt song you linked to. Perfect soundtrack to this post (once I got over the decomposing rabbit, that is).

Speaking of things that are gross, WHY are they making a live action Yogi Bear movie? I'd rather watch the decomposing rabbit all day.

Chris_Garrison said...

It's too hard to get a real TV channel on TV, so just create a TV channel online.

Start out by putting on whatever you can get for free, like your friends' old student films and home movies, streaming in an endless loop. There should be no option to watch what you want at will, just like an actual old TV ... Then maybe you could get the rights to play Ruff 'n' Ready or Crusader Rabbit for $1 or something ... Then slowly work your way up to adding all the stuff you have on this awesome schedule.

Call it the Spumco Channel!

Dave Woodward said...

This would be like a dream come true John. I'm 20 years old, and I grew up watching many of these. I remember a certain amount of time where there were were schedule blocks until TV networks decided to boot them all to Boomerang! I think Boomerang is a cool channel, but it doesn't offer that classic feeling and excitement of the old blocks. Nickelodean used to be great too. What happened?!

After the 90s, it seems like cartoons died. It'd be great to see some of your work reach a kids network block as well!

QAX said...

If only, sir, if only....those programs were and are GOLDEN and I find myself salivating at the mere idea of you doing new cartoons, whether for a network or anywhere else. I REALLY enjoy the blog.
Thanks-
Garry L. Todd

mr paal said...

no pokemon? :(

John, i just posted a lengthy study of Kaspar in which i've tried to break down the hierarchical method of approaching the drawing. I'd really appreciate if you'd take a look - i think i'm going in the right direction & i think it's working...

kaspar layout study

Best,

Paul.

John-Michael Morgan said...

Truly, this is paradise.

Whit said...

ASIFA needs to charter a plane so Gene Deitch can safely fly over China and explain "Dicky Moe" to them through a translator with a bullhorn.

Seth Nicholas Johnson said...

I desperately want to watch "Mr. Wait"!

SoleilSmile said...

^_^ I wish you had a site that can feature programming like this. It would be so fun! I miss your Spumco site. I miss the Spumco Lodge. There's gotta be a business model someone can help you come up with that would generate enough revenue for your own "Hulu" to become a reality.
Any luck on finding a volunteer web designer to get you started?

Good luck and keep us posted either way.

SoleilSmile said...

Wouldn't Mr. Wait make the greatest loading page, guys?

Bob Lilly said...

Another brilliant post. When I was a kid we only had three channels, but this stuff was pretty much the schedule. I can remember the wait. We had the test pattern, then the corncob report (after all, we kids had to know what herfords were selling for)every TV station had a local cartoon show host, sometimes with puppets. Now that would be a good character, a local cartoon TV show host. Thanks for the post, it stimulated thoughts. Please come and visit.

SandraRivas said...

That would make my Saturdays great. I used to wake up early to watch the Three Stooges.

I remember eating my cereal while watching the old Disney cartoons before my mom yelled at me to get ready for school.

And I also remember going through the slightly boring Saturday morning cartoons (Pepper Ann, etc) before they would finally get to the Bugs Bunny and Tweety show.

Mitzi said...

I'd prefer to wake up to that weekday morning schedule than another episode of "Home Movies".

JohnK said...

What the heck is a "Hulu"?

Kris said...

I would totally get up on Saturday morning watch this channel and I'm a grownup who NEVER gets up on Saturday morning.

RooniMan said...

I would definatly let my kids watch that scheduling.

Stephen Worth said...

How about a Fleischer sing along show with the three B's: Bouncing Balls, Betty Boop and Bimbo? Little girls love Boop.

C said...

Can't say I ever watched cartoons before school. I was too busy getting up at the last minute and being late.

I wish Tom and Jerry and Popeye still came on. I have fond memories of watching those as a kid.

Raff said...

Shoot!! In one of my live events I was planning to do something dangerously close to that pre-cartoon wait in basic concept and intent. Even the music (Java)! But boy did I ever get outdone. Now whatever I pull off is going to look like a lame ripoff of what you posted here.

In other words it's right after my own heart. Especially the weirdness of Mr. Wait and the random boring things like the farm report.

Dammit, that rotting rabbit is DISGUSTING!

Dayjan said...

This is essentially my goal.

Blammo said...

While we are on the topic of selling an entire programming slate to a network, how about a post pertaining to an old promise you made.

1)"Joe reveals his selling secrets to me".

After all,Joe practically controlled Saturday morning with his shows on all the networks.

MichaelVernon said...

Wow! That's the TV I grew up with.
I miss that Indian head test pattern. So last year I snagged it off of a site. I noticed one of the toys in the ad, with the cartoon kid, is Tennessee Tuxedo (Don Adams). I grew up in Toronto, So With the Buffalo TV stations, that's what TV was like. Thanks, John.

Cody Clarke said...

If that channel existed, I'd actually wake up early in the morning!

Raff said...

Just popped into my head: I picture the rabbit rotting away to reveal a shifting scary face that, in a croaky voice, names the network's underwriters. Or recites the whole TV sign-on spiel. "WGXB-TV is owned and operated by Broadcast Inc., transmitting from an antenna located on Mt. Mansfield at 325 kilowatts..."

Brown-Acid said...

Thats sounds good and all

but if u had that whole 15 minutes of Mr Wait, the angry clock, technical difficulties and the cut aways at 5:45 in the morning; for some reason id imagine that would aggravate the kids and theyd be yelling at the tv etc, in the lust for cartoons. Caffeine deprived parents would wake up to this storm of early morning thunder, leading to an increase in smacked bottoms.

Here in Australia on the new channel GO they actually run hours of Hanna-Barbera cartoons daily

Severin said...

How much could a TV network cost? Maybe if the economy completely bottoms out you could buy Nickelodeon for $25.

SoleilSmile said...

This is Hulu, Mr. K:

http://www.hulu.com/

It's a site where you get to watch your favorite TV shows for free in exchange for advertising:)

Blammo said...

1950s
The Ruff & Reddy Show (1957–1960, NBC)
The Huckleberry Hound Show (1958–1962, Syndication)
The Quick Draw McGraw Show (1959–1962, Syndication)

1960s
The Flintstones (1960–1966, ABC)
The Yogi Bear Show (1961–1962, syndicated)
Top Cat (1960–1961, ABC)
The Hanna-Barbera New Cartoon Series (1962–1963, syndicated)
The Jetsons (1962–1963, ABC; 1985–1988, syndicated)
The Magilla Gorilla Show (1963–1966, syndicated)
Peter Potamus (1964, ABC)
Jonny Quest (1964–1965, ABC; 1986–1987, syndicated)
Hey There, It's Yogi Bear! (1964, theatrical feature film)
The Atom Ant/Secret Squirrel Show (1965–1967, ABC)
Frankenstein, Jr. and The Impossibles (1966–1968, CBS)
Space Ghost and Dino Boy (1966–1968, CBS)
The Man Called Flintstone (1966, theatrical feature film)
Laurel and Hardy (1966–1967, co-production with Larry Harmon Productions and Wolper Productions, syndicated)
Birdman and the Galaxy Trio (1967–1968, NBC)
The Herculoids (1967–1969, CBS)
Fantastic Four (1967–1969, ABC)
Abbott and Costello (1967–1968, co-production with RKO-Jomar Productions, syndicated)
The Banana Splits Adventure Hour (1967–1970, NBC)
Wacky Races (1968–1969, CBS)
Scooby-Doo, Where Are You! (1969–1971, CBS)
Dastardly and Muttley in Their Flying Machines (1969–1971, CBS)
The Perils of Penelope Pitstop (1969–1971, CBS)

1970s
Josie and the Pussycats (1970–1974, CBS)
Harlem Globetrotters (1970–1972, CBS)
Help!... It's the Hair Bear Bunch! (1971–1974, CBS)
The Funky Phantom (1971–1972, ABC)
The Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm Show (1971–1972, CBS)
Wait till Your Father Gets Home (1972–1974, syndicated)
Super Friends (1973–1986, ABC)
Charlotte's Web (1973, theatrical feature film)
Speed Buggy (1973–1974, ABC)
The Addams Family (1973–1974, NBC)
Hong Kong Phooey (1974–1975, ABC)
These Are the Days (1974–1975, ABC)
Valley of the Dinosaurs (1974–1975, CBS)
Wheelie and the Chopper Bunch (1974–1975, NBC)
The Tom & Jerry/Grape Ape/Mumbly Show (1975–1976, ABC)
Jabberjaw (1976–1977, ABC)
The Scooby-Doo/Dynomutt Hour (1976–1977, ABC)
Captain Caveman and the Teen Angels (1977–1980, ABC)
Scooby's All-Star Laff-A-Lympics (1977–1979, ABC)
Yogi's Space Race (1978–1979, NBC)
Godzilla (1978–1980, NBC)
The All-New Popeye Hour (1978–1983, CBS)
The New Fred and Barney Show (1979–1980, NBC)

1980s
The Richie Rich/Scooby and Scrappy-Doo Show (1980–1982, ABC)
The Smurfs (1981–1990, NBC)
Heidi's Song (1982, theatrical feature film)
The Pac-Man/Little Rascals/Richie Rich Show (1982–1984, ABC)
Shirt Tales (1982–1984, NBC)
Snorks (1984–1988, NBC)
Challenge of the GoBots (1984–1985, syndicated)
The Funtastic World of Hanna-Barbera (1985–1994, syndicated)
Foofur (1986–1988, NBC)
Hanna-Barbera Superstars 10 (1987–1988, syndicated telefilms)
The Flintstone Kids (1986–1988, ABC)
The Greatest Adventure: Stories from the Bible (1987–1990, video series)
The Completely Mental Misadventures of Ed Grimley (1988–1989, NBC)
Fantastic Max (1988–1990, NBC)
A Pup Named Scooby-Doo (1988–1991, ABC)

1990s
The Funtastic World of Hanna-Barbera (1990, theatrical ride film)
Jetsons: The Movie (1990, theatrical feature film)
Tom & Jerry Kids (1990–1993, co-production with Turner Entertainment, Fox)
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventures (1990–1991, co-production with Orion Entertainment and Nelson Entertainment, CBS)
The Pirates of Dark Water (1991–1993, co-production with Turner Entertainment, ABC/syndication)
The Addams Family (second animated version) (1992–1994, ABC)
Once Upon A Forest (1993, theatrical feature film)
2 Stupid Dogs (1993–1995, TBS)
SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron (1993–1995, TBS)

Joe could sell!How did he do it?!

paul etcheverry said...

John, this brings back long-buried memories. I wondered if I was the only kid on my block impatiently watching test patterns and weather or farm reports before the 6:00 a.m. onslaught of much-anticipated black and white Looney Tunes!

I personally would lobby for some Jay Ward cartoons in the 1960's blocks and Fleischer Studio classics within the Thursday Harveytoons time slot.

Bryce Johansen said...

For me, it was the TeleText messages during the early morning wait for cartoons with it's boring blocky letters and pixel backgrounds.

zmerrill said...

Don't forget Beavis and Butt-head for weeknights!

John E. B. said...

no george liquor ren and stimpy ripping friends or betty boop or benie and cecil or dexter's lab? all great shows that you would have but it seems like there are plenty more classics this channel would need.Although it does sound amazing as is too

COLLIN. said...

Oh my God.
The best cartoon program schedule ever conceived of.
If such a thing existed I am more than sure that at the age of 45 I'd still be waking up early to wait for the good cartoons to come on.

Kat Lamp said...

YESSSSS!!! So brilliant!

(Also, reading about the pre-cartoon wait and time-passing gags made me laugh so hard I woke up my boyfriend and my dog!)

EalaDubh said...

And thus was the true reason for the economic meltdown revealed, because nobody wanted to go to work anymore. Hooray!

Toole said...

that thing about consolidation of creators and distributors was one of your best posts.

Yowp said...

No consultants? No focus groups? No test marketing? No programme practices people? No pandering to the politically correct and perennially offended?

But television can't survive without all that stuff. All the research says so.

Yowp

Brian Goss said...

Bakshi's Mighty Heroes is an awesome choice, John!

ThomasHjorthaab said...

Sounds like it would be really funny:)
I can't wait till you have done a Kaspar cartoon!

John said...

It's so... beautiful!

Katy Lloyd said...

Mr. K, this post is amazing- it actually gave me that fuzzy, bouncing, sparky feeling of excitement. The kind that lives deep in your belly and usually only surfaces around Christmas when you're under 12.
There's got to be a producer-exec out there Somewhere who can see the importance of magic!
Also I second the guy who said that little girls love Betty Boop.

Ollie said...

This sounds great John, I remember when Cartoon Network in England used to show all those old Hanna-Barbera cartoons. Once they showed a whole week of nothing but the Flintstones, it was the best! I remember when they started showing other cartoons again that I still wanted to watch the Flintstones. Haha!

We also had a show called Rolf's cartoon club, where Rolf Harris would teach you how to draw all the cartoon characters and then show the cartoons that he'd just taught you how to draw. And then at the end he would paint a huge picture on the wall, his catchphrase was ''Can you tell what it is yet?'' Which he would always say when he was painting it. It was great.

Jorge Garrido said...

Wow! Great line-up! If I were you'd include animated movies of the week and an action cartoon block, too. You could show Jonny Quest, Astro Boy, Gigantor, Speed Racer, Space Ghost, Birdman, Batman: The Animated Series, etc...

JohnK said...

Done!

Landon said...

Man, you sure have a lot of ideas for this, John. I can totally see this happening. If it really happened, it would probably be the best thing on television in this age of mediocrity.

I pretty much gave up watching television for how dull it's gotten lately. If this were a real channel, this would introduce children today of the good stuff we were raised on in the 20th Century, & I would love to watch it myself.

mike f. said...

Sign me up! (BTW, what happened to the Black & White Cartoon Club and the Color Jail?)

Trevor Thompson said...

It would be very easy to make a website that could run programming live 24 /7 without too much initial investment. Tom Green does a live show from his house every night at 8, and when he's off the air, he broadcasts best-of packages.

But he's in the same boat you are, John. He can't make money.

Maybe you could do like Soleil was suggesting and make the programming free and get money from advertising on the site as well as the programs. Or maybe you could show old cereal and toy commercials by companies and products who are still in business and use that to generate ad revenue as well as catering to the retro crowd.

Who knows?

- trevor.

PS: Domain names and servers are really inexpensive these days.

Kaiser Fate said...

John running a kid's network?

I'd like it to happen, but the concept is difficult to fully grasp.

Brian Romero said...

This is a cool idea, but families do not watch TV like they did in the 50's anymore. Television programming as we know it is being phased out. The fact that you didn't know what Hulu was shows that you're not in touch with modern viewing habits. TV is going towards a paradigm that put's the control of programming in the hands of the viewer. Parents are becoming more likely to throw in a DVD or DVR'd episode of their child's favorite show rather than tune into a channel and let their kids watch whatever is on. Soon, most if not all programming will be available "on demand". Parents will create a playlist of shows for their kids to watch. I suggest you collaborate with someone who can help you translate your vision to work with where entertainment and technology is going and not where it was decades ago.

Gad said...

Their is only one thing missing from your Channel, a little action
I could never understand what the deal with Tom and Jerry; it's just like road runner and coyote, only boring. when ever there was some thing on TV made William Hanna and Joseph Barbera if would turn on the v.c.r and put my Lonny Tunes collections, or my chuck Jones jungle book tape... or a tape of Terminator or die Hard! every thing was better then that boring cat and mouse.
If there would be a channel really meant for kids this couple shouldn't lay a paw in it.

JohnK said...

Well I agree with you Brian, but unfortunately the business doesn't yet.

I've been pushing what you're talking about for 15 years, but to this day business will only invest real money in television.

The Artist Aficionado said...

Good luck John and I mean your going to need a lot of it these days to realize your vision. The television industry is to over invested in the internet video and on-demand market and the tivo program these days. I have to strongly agree with Brian that families and companies are finding alternatives.

The early morning programming blocks have been replaced by shows that are quickly moved to the internet or on demand market after airing. Its great your trying to reverse that.

However the executives of most networks including Fox, Cartoon Network, Disney, and "your old pals" at Nickolodean *joking* have abandoned the early morning market.

This is because they feel that people are spending more time elsewhere than watching re-runs that you can never get sick of.

JohnK said...

Like I said

I agree with him too. The business doesn't.

The Artist Aficionado said...

"Joe could sell!How did he do it?!"

Blammo Joe had a consistently creative mind that I think we all wish we could have. I think he is a pioneer in television marketing that set the standard even today. That's why H&B has produced one of the largest outputs of cartoons in animation history.

The Artist Aficionado said...

This is a good idea whats next Spumco Land seriously your version of Disney Land. Just imagine I'd really love to see that idea be executed.

Hannah-Barbera attempted the same thing.http://mistertoast.blogspot.com/2007/04/hanna-barbera-land.html

Brian Romero said...

You are right John. Unfortunately network execs are like music execs. Trying to squeeze money from a dying system rather than focusing on how to make something new that entertains, gives consumers control and makes the execs a crap load of money. I guess asking for execs with vision is too much. Heh-heh.

JohnK said...

These ideas could easily be adapted to an online network. It's just that no one will invest any money in an online network.
Not that TV will do anything logical either.

It's all just wishful thinking.

Imagining if people in charge of entertainment wanted you to have fun.

Ash Collins said...

dude, no kid wants to watch the flintstones. say what you like about the designs and the colour palettes (which are nice), it's terribly animated and it ISNT funny. maybe it was in simpler times - like the middle ages - but it just sucks. same goes for topcat.

The Artist Aficionado said...

No kid wants to see the Flinstones?
There are a lot of artists that weren't alive to see the original Flinstones including me. The show none the less has still influenced me and younger groups of artists heavily we have fallen in love with the nostalgic feel of it.

The flintstones is not dated by a certain time. Its a timeless classic. John K. wasn't alive to see Bob Clampetts tenure at Warner Bros. yet it has influenced his style and characters.

Kids from later generations can be influenced by work that took place years before they were of age. Some things remain timeless.

Geneva said...

I think at night you could run all of those really old, baffling, backwards, and off-brand cartoons (like the foreign Tom and Jerrys, or Famous Studios cartoons). I've gotten a lot of my friends who aren't cartoon buffs to find those hysterical.

You should take over Boomerang! You could banish all that Scooby Doo nonsense.

mike f. said...

[dude, no kid wants to watch the flintstones. say what you like about the designs and the colour palettes (which are nice), it's terribly animated and it ISNT funny. maybe it was in simpler times - like the middle ages - but it just sucks. same goes for topcat.]

Whoa, Duuuuuuude - RoboCop 3 was totally awesome!!! And metal hooks through the mouth are soooooo cool!!!

Good luck finding work, genius.

rodineisilveira said...

Johnny K.,

I know this image adjust reference!
This is the legendary indian head adjust, which was developed by RCA in 1939.
The "indian head" adjust also was very used here in Brazil, during the 60s.

Backthrow said...

Good stuff, John, but what would you schedule for the crucial Saturday afternoon slot? Back in the the day, that was about as big a deal as Saturday mornings, especially if it was raining outside.

In my opinion, what is sorely needed is old-school monster movies, preferably in hosted, double-feature form. Kids need to see ABBOTT & COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN, MIGHTY JOE YOUNG, THEM, FORBIDDEN PLANET, THE WOLF MAN, GODZILLA VS THE THING, WAR OF THE WORLDS, etc, as an important part of this complete breakfast!

Or maybe "THE MYSTERY MOVIE JACKPOT THEATRE":

Kids file into a screening room, where a goofy emcee in a tux with a loud tie, and wearing coke-bottle glasses, addresses them in front of a big screen. On the walls are painted movie posters promising "Laughs! Thrills! Adventure!".

The host picks a different kid out of the group each week to step up and do the honors, throwing the lever. This activates a big slot machine display on the screen with spinning tumblers, featuring random images of actor faces, monsters, animals, etc.

What will the movie be... ROBINSON CRUSOE ON MARS? TARZAN IN THE VALLEY OF GOLD? THE INCREDIBLE MR. LIMPET? TARANTULA?

Three Kirk Douglases means they get to see TWENTY THOUSAND LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA or THE VIKINGS. Three lemons means PIPPI
LONGSTOCKING or ALAKAZAM THE GREAT.

The kid who throws the lever gets the praise or blame from his peers over the fun quotient of the flick, either winning a cool prize (somehow related to the movie) at the end of the show, or some harmless punishment (ditto), as fate is fickle and often cruel.

mike f. said...

I sent my nieces and nephew - ages 6 thru 15 - the Complete Uncut Little Rascals DVD box set (Hal Roach only, of course. No MGM "Froggy" bullshit!) and they went absolutely APE SHIT.

There are 80 two-reelers in all, none of them made any later than 1938 - that's over seventy years ago for chrissakes! - and they've seen each one multiple times and love them all. Now, whenever I talk to them I have to answer a slew of questions about Our Gang comedies. (They also love Three Stooges, Fleischer Popeyes, classic Tom & Jerry, Tex Avery Droopy cartoons and Looney Tunes. They watch 'em all on DVD, 'cause they ain't on television.)

If I tried telling that to a stupid hippie executive, I'd get a song and dance about "stereotypes" and "sexist roles" and "kids hate b&w film", etc. etc, ad nauseum...

When I attempted to explain some of the dated caricatures of the past and some other "creaky" aspects of early talkies to them - and got stopped cold. "We KNOW all that, Uncle Mike. We're not dumb!"

Well, they sure aren't, but TV executives think they are. Maybe their kids are stupid, but average American kids aren't.

Stephen Worth said...

I'll second Mike's rave about Our Gang (the name isn't "Little Rascals", it's "Our Gang"). I'd add Laurel & Hardy and just about any other Roach comedy shorts too.

Adam Gunn said...

This is a great Idea all around! But I especially like the morning programming. Secret Cartoon Club's really great too.
In the 80s I use to wake as early as I could every school day to wait for The Mighty Hercules to come on CBC. I'd wait for the colour bars to change to some video of a guy climbing a transmission tower to the theme of O Canada. Then i'd get really excited cause that meant Hercules would be on soon!

mansard peridot said...

that does it. im going out to buy more lottery tickets so i can win and buy you your own cable channel!

Andrés Sanhueza said...

In the US there are something like "contestable" funds? Down here (Chile) there are at least 3 parties (The TV council, the 'Production Development Corporation' and 'National fund for Cultural Development and Arts') that give funds to independent projects each year. Lot of good stuff have emerged from that.

Pat Desilets said...

A while ago a bunch of kids put together a very interesting online tv station that I have been watching for a few years.

gbs.tv

It's deliciously irrelevant and random, bunch of old stuff, old cartoons old tv ads and video archives of weird science experiments from the 1940's, strange drive-in intermissions, and all sorts of cool stuff like that, mixed in with ridiculous (but usually short) stuff from the internet. No choosing, it streams and you watch.

It's random and can get crappy at times but it's usually pretty interesting.


Anyway my point is,
it probably isn't that expensive to set up, if a bunch of kids did it.
I'm sure you could find a way to do something like that for cheap, with your idea of a programming schedule instead of the random stuff, and get your blog readers to draw attention to it.

I guess it would be hard to get it sponsored at first, but once you get a good following on it - and I'm sure you would - it could gradually become a legitimate internet broadcaster.

anyway give gbs a try you'll see what I mean.

Various said...

That's a great schedule. The only thing I'd request is that you replace the Indian Head test card with the BBC's Test Card F!

Pokey said...

& Mr.John K., don't forget that much of the stock music that you and your buddies used to use on Ren and Stimpy played under many of those test cards, both in USA and England!!!!

Not to mention the technicolor bars.

Isaak said...

The main thing to watch out for would be the executives who would come in when the channel achieves success and show their business acumen by commanding you to fit their vision. You would be become their great scourge and your viewers would wait with bated breath for you to triumph.

Isaak said...

Have you tried to go to the "executives" to pitch this concept? Or did Cartoon Network's decline sour you on "executives?

The cartoons of yesteryear deserve to see light even if their eventual fate is to be sent away in a year for South Park(even though I love a good portion of the episodes) and Fairly Oddparents.