Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Heartaches Pilot 9 : Junk Yard Dog

While poor Roxy mopes and frets about the fate of her beloved fake poodle, let's take a slight interlude and visit the seedier part of town the next day. At the local dump, we see a brawny bulldog digging through the trash looking for discarded treasure.
He feels something interesting and yanks it out of the refuse. Hmm...what the heck is this thing?
He flips it over a few times and studies it.
He spots an unusual piece of anatomy, but then figures we all have our flaws.
He's impressed by the fancy styling of the poodle curls and colors.
"Yer one of them fancy uptown dames, ain't ya?" he asks. He shakes her to see how hardy she is.
He makes a decision. "Hey, you're kinda cute! I'm gonna make you my wife!"
Filled with the bliss of fresh love, he drags his betrothed to his lair.
Proudly, he shows off his house, which he is eager to share with his new love. "It ain't much, but it's packed with love!"

Clunk! He tosses his sweetie in, as ancient tradition dictates.
He follows in after her and almost fits. "All it needs is your woman's touch." he coos, as his tail twitches up and down.
Night falls and love fills the world of the ghetto.

BTW, would you watch this crap if it was on Cartoon Network or something? Or is it too sissified being for girls and all.

52 comments:

Chris_Garrison said...

I thought the poodle was a boy, based on his voice in the commercials! Now he's a girl? Or does the bulldog just THINK he is?

> BTW, would you watch this crap if it was on Cartoon Network or something? Or is it too sissified being for girls and all.

I'd watch it, because the manly John K styling and jokes make it enjoyable. But I'm wondering whether, when you mix manly styling and jokes with girlie girls and stories, do you get something that appeals to both audiences, or neither?

(And I heard Cartoon Network wants to be for boys right now, so the Heartaches might find a better home elsewhere.)

Bob Lilly said...

I probably wouldn't watch this if it were done by somebody other than John K. I dig the facial expressions on the roughs. They say that the Pluto seemed to think because of his eye movements. The Bulldog in your roughs seems to think because of the way he purses his lips.

logan said...

Yep, seems interesting so far!

Just don't count on Cartoon Network being the most supportive of people. They're idiots, if you ask me. Always seems like they're picking up a series for two seasons one moment, then dumping it abruptly the next.

When "Chowder" was still in production, CN would haplessly rearrange its air schedule without contacting the studio. Not cool.

dancing platypuss said...

i´d watch it i guess

Rusty said...

You have been in talks with Cartoon Network for awhile. Is it true they give you more creative control than Nick?

Anyway as long as you don't sell out with shallow merchandising deals like many cartoon shows seem to do and stay true to your style I think it will attract everyone. Just think to yourself "What made Ren and Stimpy great?" and apply it here.

I just want to be sure that if I enjoyed Ren and Stimpy that this wont alienate me or other fans of that series.

RooniMan said...

If it was on Cartoon Network, chances are, it will be painful to watch, considering the "branded entertainment" system they use today.

If this was done to your favoring I would watch it. I don't find it sissy at all.

yawn said...

Yea I'd watch it. It has enough good gags, to keep it from being just another ordinary kids show. I think it would also work well as a comic book.

Cody said...

I'm not a girl or a sissy, and I would definitely watch it! Just cause it's for girls doesn't mean it's sissified. If you're name's attached to it, then it's cartoon gold.

God I hate Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon. I wish there was a REAL CARTOON network, where they'd show classic cartoons and high quality new ones (like the ones you do). A brand new network dedicated to true cartoons and animation!

Roberto Severino said...

I can definitely see the Bob McKimson influence in the way that bulldog is drawn. You can make any type of paper, even cheap, crappy, lined paper look good.

And yes John, you need to pitch this to Cartoon Network. Who have you pitched this to?

Juz Capes said...

These drawings are so great, they really get my cartoon brain going for my story drawings.

I am still doing the P Blair stuff, but these story sketches are just too good, so much creativity & fun!

Thank you for sharing them.

Amir Avni said...

This made me laugh out loud for real! I don't watch TV, but I would if THIS was on.

Chris said...

I think I speak for everyone when I say that we'd watch anything you produce! (With the exception of bodily excretions)

Ray said...

"I'm gonna make you my wife!", oh man that made me laugh hard. I'm 31 John and yes I'd even watch it on Cartoon Network. I don't think it's sissified, it has just enough heart and laughs to keep viewers.

Isaac said...

Are there a lot of eight- to fourteen-year-olds browsing this site? You'll need to ask them.

Paul B said...

I think it is for both girls and boys. I also collect vintage toys, and I love them! so in a way I can identify with Roxy. I think what really matters is that it's fun and fun is for both men and women.

Severin said...

Cartoon Network in its current state isn't a good place for anything.

Would it work on TV? Jesus, hard to say. I can't really think of any show that currently fills the niche you're going after. That could mean one of two things; either there is a market for girly cartoons that isn't being met, or the audience just isn't interested.

What about Joe Murray's upcoming online cartoon channel?

Pedro Vargas said...

No, definitely not crap. It'll beat the crap out of the horrid "tween" shows that are out now.

Kids now I think need something new that has good quality entertainment, and The Heartaches, from what I've seen, definitely provide that!

Cartoon Network has gotta stop doing that "hip" and "edgy" fake 'tude stuff and focus on entertaining the youth with some fun stories and great characters. Stuff kids can connect to as human beings.

Elana Pritchard said...

Hell yeah! It has the John K humor and weirdness people love!

(Plus both boys and girls can identify with parents throwing out their stuff and ruining their lives.)

If you need me to slap some sense into the executives I'll show up fists ablaze...

marcushelbling said...

This show looks absolutely amazing. I would pre-order this show on DVD before you even begin animating!

Andrés Sanhueza said...

I'm a man and I watch the Powerpuff Girls without problem and several people do, but that seems like a rare exception since most of "girly" shows seems repulsive to me. I'm not sure of what it depends.

Elana Pritchard said...

p.s. if you think girls are sissified check out my Jim Smith portrait...

she'll kick your ass gentlemen...

Lluis fuzzhound said...

I'd watch it for sure!!! I'm diggin reading these a lot! thanks!

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

HAHHAWHAWHAW!!!!!

bergsten said...

"Would I watch it"?

Yeah, if I knew about it.

In other words, if CN actually promoted it, and didn't change its airtime every other week.

Anyway, it's far less sissified than the rest of the crap on TV these days...

Sven Hoek said...

If the animation is good, Im there. I don't care if it has girly content as long as it has good movement and good jokes.

I like the Mighty B and its pretty girlified.

Sven Hoek said...

if the final product looks anywhere near as good as the roughs, then it will be great.

By the way, it looks hilarious already.

Jack G. said...

I'm interested in checking out whatever you try your hand at.

This particular sequence is funny and entertaining.

The stories you've been putting up haven't had too much gross-out stuff in 'em. I think that's good, because you've been there and done that already.

Oh, and if you have time can you check out my hand-inked Georges?

George Inks

Peter Bernard said...

You're joking that this is for girls, I presume.

SandraRivas said...

If this show was on Cartoon Network, I would feel like a little kid again.

Coming home from school and always turning on the television whenever this show would start. I would never miss a single episode and I would even record some of my favorites.

It would be more popular for girls but I'm pretty sure even the boys would watch it. Many would think that Looney Tunes was for kids but even adults liked it.

So yes, I would watch this show.

Bob said...

it is awesome, it has a really clever and funny story. Not too grotesque for the squemish, but you still have ur moments. The part when roxy snaps is priceless also when roxy's mom asks her what's wrong did somebody die? I hear that from so many disgruntled women in NY and I thought that was hilarious. I can't wait for the conclusion of the tale, but the way you tell a story I have no idea how it will end

kurtwil said...

If I __had__ Cartoon Network, yes I would watch the show. Most of what I've seen there is dull and formula-matic. This isn't.

...and if Cartoon Network doesn't pick it up, I suspect some other clueful network, or possibly internet publisher, would.

Viral Advertising Firm said...

yeah, I must agree, I thought the poodle was a male all this time. It just felt like a male to me all this time.

And yes, I'd watch this.

Jeff M said...

I would watch it. It's something really original and it remains funny despite being a little sissified. If it was given enough of a chance I think it could be a really successful animated sitcom.

Niki said...

This made me feel all kindsa bad.

"animals strike curious poses
they want to eat
to eat up on me and you!"

Calvin said...

Hell yeah I'd watch this!

JohnK said...

Yes, the poodle toy is a boy. The bulldog just thinks he's a girl because of his beautiful poodle curls.

Kieran Pertnav said...

Yeah.
To be honest, I think it's about time you got to making more cartoons.

Most executives are stupid demographic whores even though when you think about it what the fuck is a demographic anyway? I'm a guy, I also happen to own the complete series of the Powerpuff Girls. PPG was CN's most successful series. Period. And it was about a bunch of kindergarden girls.

So yeah, if they know what they're doing, they shouldn't care. And audiences know what they like. You always talk about what kids want, and say that executives hate kids, so why not actually show the kids some love and try to get your shows on the air.

Don't worry about it, just pitch the damn thing already.

Mr. Tat said...

I'd see it on Cartoon Network. The characters make a good impression. A Captain Caveman hippie with a sharp business woman getting together? A funny opposite and different from the usual pairing. The poodle wind-up toy is no slouch either. With characterizations like those, some gags like the mistaken gender as seen come naturally.

I never really understood the target audience for gender. Dolls or action figures, both seem to be part of the same coin to me.

Scrawnypumpkinseed said...

I honestly don't mind if the characters are girls or boys but it better be funny!

Trevor G. said...

I would watch it, but I'm not a girl. I think it's just the opposite. I think you need to sissify it a bit more there John.

Women hate that 'pleading for his life' stuff. (The bug scene) I just got flack for a similar joke myself this very day.

I saw a Lorris, a cuddly little lemur type animal and I thought, 'how funny it would be in a cartoon sense to throw one of these little critters at people'. I expressed this joke in the unbeknownst presence of a lady and viola. Instant rebuke!

Maybe you're hoping for an 'oh poor bug!' reaction from the girls but I think you might get more of a 'this is guy humor'.

Anyways, run it by some ladies first maybe you'll get a different opinion.

Kali Fontecchio said...

It should definitely be on tv.

Katy Lloyd said...

I would watch it! but I am girl.
If it's funny, it will appeal to all!
I liked the bug-eating scene, I think girls get tired of being represented as boring or 'sassy'. girls can be funny too!

Ashelnaut said...

What are you saying, John? I would so damn watch this!

It's tons better than what executives think is 'girly'. I think it hits home better with girls rather than the overabusive use of pink and brain-dead characters.

Go pitch it already!

yawn said...

I completely agree with Katy, the bug eating scene was hilarious.

Benjamin Anders said...

Great drawings and designs. I'd definitely watch this if it were on TV!

Geneva said...

I HATED sissy cartoons as a little girl! I would have watched this because it is cute, but actually funny. I also would have liked more gross-out stuff, but I understand that little kids nowadays wilt like daisies when presented with anything like that nowadays (well, at least their parents do).

Anyway, YES! I am a girl, but I was also a tomboy, and I would have approved.

Damiano D said...

Hi John, I met one of your former Spumco employees up here in Toronto over the weekend and I was delighted by the stories I heard. It really made my month!

As for the cartoon, I would watch it. Although, to be honest, only because I know the effort that you would put into it would make it worth while. I don't think it's too sissy or anything but I think that it kinda lacks a certain punch or intensity that I am normally familiar with. Although that's just what I'm getting from these lil doodles. I'd love to see it animated though to properly judge it.

Ryan said...

I'd watch it, but a John K variety show would easily become one of my favourite shows of all time.

PatriS said...

We definitly need a john k show, and I would watch this without a doubt.

Josh said...

It's really fun! I would watch it because I pretty much love everything you make, but a show that's a little more "unisex" might go over better. I don't think the average guy would be interested in The Heartaches.

Either way, the story is hilarious and I want to see how it ends!

Kid_Jacob said...

Oh I would SO watch this. I was surprised when you called it a "girlie" show. Besides having a female protagonist, there's nothing inherently girlie about Heartaches. Powerpuff girls, for example, had all girl protagonists, but I know it attracted a lot of dude viewers (like me, for example). If it's good it's good, John.

LS said...

Of course I'd watch it! Although I doubt the CN execs would accept to make it.