Here are some scattered pieces of fossil evidence of great days and greater creatures long gone.
From these few fragments and my immense powers of deduction I was able to piece together an accurate depiction of primitive life in a more beautiful age.
A petrified pair of googly eyes...
a couple of gouged out plugs of flesh...
A remnant of a paw with the fingernails on the inside of the hand...
another...From these meager archaeological scraps we can remagine ravenous creatures of the past meeting up with and devouring the first few members of our smaller modern cousins.
This was Bedrock City Arizona in a Golden time... long before modern man came along to destroy its greatness.
Eons ago, my buddies and I used to take periodic treks into prehistory to experience the majesty of a naturally evolved off-model theme park, untouched by executives.
Here are the happy sentinels of Bedrock, eager to greet us while urging us to crawl into the belly of their pet giant land Lamprey.
We were too tricky to fall for that old ruse, and explored the park at will.
This famous animator forged a whole new style of motion and changed the face of modern cartoons.(after visiting Bedrock City)
Seriously folks,
I hear Disney purists complain and whine all the time that Disneyland is being ruined more and more every year by getting away from Walt Disney's vision and characters. Executives keep taking out all Walt's creations and replacing them with foul things like Star Wars land and "Toontown". The cool giant squid from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea has been changed into some wimpy fish thing, Tomorrowland was destroyed decades ago; and now they are talking about redesigning Mary Blair's Small World Ride etc.
All this is definite blasphemy but nothing compared to what happened to Bedrock City and it's high time this abominable horror has been exposed.
RASH EXECUTIVE DECISION DESTROYS AMERICA'S GREATEST NATIONAL TREASURE!
About 10 years ago (maybe more) Fred Seibert told me he had discovered this awful Flintstones theme park in Arizona where the character costumes were really off model And the place was run down. He was thinking of closing it because it was an "embarrasment" to the HB legacy. Then I told him how much I loved Bedrock City because of it's honest and natural pure off-modelness. And that "of-model" toys and costumes and cartons had inspired me to draw my own caricatured versions of old characters:
This is from a Flintstone Laser-disk set I produced for Fred a couple years earlier.
http://arglebarglin.blogspot.com/2007/02/flintstones-first-fourteen.html
So Fred decided not to close Bedrock City, but instead to update it and make it "hip". He went and hired someone to copy my own off-model drawings of the Flintstones and then he threw out all the old cool stuff that was naturally evolved and innocently off-model and replaced it with pseudo hipness.
Aaaaaargh!
It's so rare to have really authentic off-model worlds that I consider it a high crime to throw one away and replace it with fakeness.
Now Fred is probably about as good as cartoon executives get - he actually likes cartoonists - but some things are sacred and should be protected from random tasteless executive whim. There's nothing worse than when execs (the unhippest people on the planet) try to update things and make them hip. It should be illegal.Here's another natural wonder of off-modelness:
For God's sake, don't tell any hip-executives about it!
